This week, I want to spend some time discussing a question that has shown up in my inbox a few times recently. Especially after I received one email from a reader who was recently laid off TWICE in the past year and considering this idea, I thought it might be a good time to revisit the topic of how to be a Stay at Home Mom. Our friend Erin wrote about being a STAY AT HOME MOM, Stacy has written about it for other sites, and I’ve even covered how I feel as a husband of a STAY AT HOME MOM via video, but today’s post is specifically for those who want to know whether or not they CAN and SHOULD be a STAY AT HOME MOM. Let’s look at the top 10 questions I believe every couple should agree on before making this BIG decision (in no particular order) and hopefully that will get the discussion flowing in the comments. Here goes: [Read more…]
Five Minutes on Chores
Well, you told us you liked this whole Stacy + Barry video thing so I’m throwing another one at you this week. I promise it won’t be an every Saturday thing, but we had the opportunity for some peace and quiet and so we took it. A few of you asked about how we approach household chores – how we decide whether Stacy or Barry is going to do certain tasks. You asked…we answered. As with last week’s post on marriage, this is raw, unedited and totally off-the-cuff.
You’ll think we sound like the Cleavers being interviewed. Picture it with me: Ward and June sitting on a lovely couch, interviewed by a nice early 60’s reporter. It goes something like this:
Five Minutes on Marriage
This week is a bit of a departure from my normal posts. Why? We’re trying something new, simple as that. While Stacy and I were talking the other day, we came up with the idea that if we were put in front of a camera and simply started talking about something, there may be a little humor, a little fun and maybe even a nugget or two of wisdom that would result. We decided on the following ground rules:
- Before the camera was turned on, we would decide only on what topic or question we would discuss.
- No pre-planning allowed.
- When the camera starts rolling, so does a five-minute timer.
- When the timer is done, we’re done.
- No second takes.
- No editing after we’re done except to trim off the beginning and end. [Read more…]
A College Degree Without Debt? Yes You Can!
Today I’m excited to have a good friend of mine, Cy Vanover, sharing his knowledge on getting a college degree without debt. Cy is a genius at this stuff and just came out with his first book on the subject so even though this post is a bit long, READ IT and SHARE IT with anyone who may be planning for college anytime soon.
Since 1978, the average price of college tuition has increased 1,100 percent. No folks, that’s not a typo … a 1,100 percent increase, even when adjusting for inflation. But don’t take my word for it; that statistic comes directly from William (Bill) Bennett, former Secretary of Education under Ronald Reagan.
There was a time (not that long ago) when students could pay their way through school by working part-time construction jobs and graduating completely debt-free. Yes, they had to live very frugal lives in order to do it, but do it they did. What happened to those days?
[Read more…]Babywearing in a Moby Wrap
NOTE: Another long post with a video…so, you’ve been warned. 😉
When I first started babywearing with Annie, I used cheap carriers. While they did the job, they weren’t very comfortable…and then I met the Moby Wrap. I remember the first time I wore Annie in my Moby – I remember thinking “Now THIS is how it’s supposed to be!” It just felt right…snug and secure. I fell in love with it immediately.
When I am in the front-carry stage, the Moby Wrap is hands-down my favorite carrier. I like the fit – I like how it feels so secure – I like how fast and easy I can put it on – I like that I can put it on before I leave the house – I like that it’s machine washable when it gets baby snot all over it…or when Mama drops hot dog chili all down the front panel. [Read more…]
A Father’s Day Gift He’ll Actually Use
Okay, so here’s the deal. I used to think Father’s Day was one of those ridiculous holidays that the greeting card companies hyped up to help out their cash flow…you know, like they did with Valentine’s Day, St. Patrick’s Day, etc., etc. (sidebar: for those of you who actually celebrate the aforementioned holidays for the RIGHT reasons instead of an excuse to buy expensive stuff or drink green beer, I applaud you and you should not be offended that I poked a little fuy”? Why am I pushing you to buy it? Because as I see it, you can either get him this and watch him enjoy it for a long time to come or you can buy him any other gift and he’ll still smell like…well…like a guy.n at the ridiculousness of how MOST people celebrate these events). Anyway, for the past couple of years, Stacy has looked at Father’s Day through the lens of being frugal and also by asking dads to share some funny stories. This time around, I dug deep into my thoughts and asked myself: “self, what would you like as an awesome Father’s Day gift – one you’d actually use?” Self responded: “a Porsche 911 GT2, no speed limit and a full fuel tank.” Then I told self he was being a little ridiculous. So when self came to his senses, we agreed something a bit more reasonable might be in order.
Here’s what we came up with.
Men, in general, don’t smell very good. But you have to let me explain why. Our options are as follows:
- Smell bad
- Smell like a 1980’s used car salesman (you know the type)
- Smell like a girl [Read more…]
Babywearing with a Ring Sling
Guest post by Brandy Nichols
The very first way I learned to carry my child (other than my arms) was in a ring sling. My husband’s mother gave me one in those very early days with my first baby. I think I must have gone around for a year or more, wearing my sling or mei tai much of the time. Many folks love using ring slings for getting their child up and down quickly and praise them even in the toddler years.
A ring sling is a length of cloth where one end is threaded with sling rings, folded over and sewn (very well). The other end, the tail, is free. It’s threaded through the rings, too, to make an adjustable pocket for the baby. Ring slings are not the same as those infamous bag slings from a few years ago. I like ring slings for carrying very small babies most of all. There’s not lots of fabric to wrap around them and no special inserts or adjustments required, such as for soft-structured carriers. Babies are only very little for a short time, anyway. [Read more…]
Babywearing in a Mei Tai
NOTE: This post is a bit long and includes two videos. Proceed with caution. 😉
The first carrier I’m going to focus on in this babywearing series is the Mei Tai…not to be confused with the alcoholic drink. Please do not drink and babywear. HAHAHAHAHA! The way I talk about drinking all the time, you’d think I was a big alchy. But anyway, I digress. Editor’s note: Stacy is not an alcoholic.
A Mei Tai is an Asian-inspired baby carrier. It has a tie around the waist and two straps that you put over your shoulders and cross in the back. You tie around the baby or around yourself to strap the baby in. You can front carry or back carry in this type of carrier. One will generally cost between $50-100.
My carrier from Gracie and Sam has a clip belt, but most Mei Tais come with a tie strap. I’ve used both and they are both easy to use. You simply tie it on, put baby in it, then tie it around yourself….see below for front and back carry videos.
So, you’re likely going to hear me say this in each post –buy a GOOD baby carrier. Just like you spend good money on a car seat and you research what is the best, do the same for your baby carrier. You’re going to wear it for a while, so YOU need to be comfortable and you need your BABY to be comfortable. Don’t pinch pennies too bad when it comes to a carrier – they are worth the money…and this is coming from Cheapo Stacy Who Picks Up Pennies in the Parking Lot.
You can spend between $50-200 for a good carrier. You can spend less and you can spend more. You can buy brand new or you can buy used. Either way – buy a good one…a good quality one that meets CPSIA requirements. (Note: Gracie and Sam (LLC) Mei Tais are compliant with Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) and Consumer Product Safety Improvement Act (CPSIA) requirements.)
Good baby-carriers are worth EVERY SINGLE PENNY.
Why would you want a Mei Tai? If you want a carrier that’s easy to master and doesn’t require much tying, then you would enjoy this carrier. It distributes weight evenly so you don’t get tired very quickly. I’m able to strap it on quickly when I’m out and about. It works great in the grocery store and great in the park. It ranks in my top three: Moby, Mei Tai and Ergo/Boba.
Why would you NOT want a Mei Tai? If you struggle with tying knots, this is not the carrier for you. 😉 It’s not one of the cheapest options, but in my opinion it’s one of the best options out there for baby-wearing. If you have no plans to front carry, you might not want a Mei Tai – I love front carry, so that’s why I enjoy this carrier. I don’t use it once I move to back carry – although Brandy will show you how you can also use it for back carry if you desire. It’s not a good carrier to breastfeed in – or at least I haven’t mastered that. 🙂
This carrier is easy to put on and it’s easy to take off. It’s not too hot in the summer so that you sweat like a pig when wearing it. I know I’m going to be using this Gracie and Sam carrier a LOT this upcoming summer…especially at the grocery store.
My review: After using her Mei Tai for several weeks, I can tell you one thing: it’s top notch. It’s one of the best baby carriers I’ve ever worn. I love the colors and I love the fit. The padded shoulder straps are very comfy on my bony shoulders and it’s easy to get a tight fit. It’s very comfortable to wear for long periods of time and Andy enjoys it – he falls asleep in it very easily.
I love the custom made reversible pattern. It means I have ONE carrier that I can use for a girl or boy. I also love how fast it is to put on – I can easily strap it on in a store parking lot and be ready to go. The package arrived nicely put together and came with instructions and a thank-you note.
Brandy’s review of the Gracie and Sam Mei Tai:
I’ve made over two dozen mei tais in my babywearing years, so I feel I’ve had a lot of experience using them. I’m probably the more critical reviewer. The Sam and Gracie mei tai was surprisingly light, but very well made. I carried an almost two year old in it using back carry. I am accustomed to ones that are a bit heavier, but this one seemed as though it would work nicely in hot weather. The fabric seemed as though it would not develop much of a memory with prolonged use, which is desirable. By memory, I mean holding wrinkles that fade over time and may compromise the integrity of the fabric. Ironing can help avoid this, but who wants to iron their carrier every week or so?
The sewing on the mei tai was very neat. Everything seemed to be very well attached. The straps were padded, which is not my personal preference, but the padding was comfortable. I prefer unpadded straps because I feel they conform to my shoulders better. Padded straps tend to feel like they’re sliding off my shoulders, even if they’re not. The lighter straps were easy to tie and gripped nicely. The shoulder and waist straps were a generous length, which I find helpful as an expectant mother. I liked that the carrier was easily reversible, but I do wish the waist strap was a bit heftier. It did grip well and stay in place once adjusted.
NOTE from Valerie of Gracie and Sam:
- I tear rather than cut my straps. This allows the straps to be along the warp of the fabric exactly, making them a bit stronger and removing any chance of stretch. I’d rather adjust my straps intentionally than have the droop during the day because of any unintended bias-based cutting giving them stretch.
- When I put all the pieces together and do my first sewing around, straps (shoulders and waist) get backstitched at their points of insertion as well as in the center of the straps. So all seams that are stressed are already reinforced from the get-go.
- The carrier is turned right side out and top-stitched, adding another set of stitching to everything attached. The straps are box stitched.
**I was sent a Gracie and Sam Mei Tai to review. All opinions are mine and I really, REALLY love this carrier. Amen and amen.**
**Winner of the Gracie and Sam giveaway was Cheryl Creevey**
Setting Family Priorities
There are just some things in life that are non-negotiable. They are top priorities and unless the apocalypse occurs, these things won’t take a back seat to other stuff that might come up. Because our family has been struggling lately to find enough time to make everything fit in a 24-hour span, I thought I’d spend a few minutes today sharing some of our family’s non-negotiables. Here are our family priorities (in no particular order):
[Read more…]The Advantages of Babywearing
Written by Brandy Nichols, Contributing Writer
When I had my first child, I thought of babywearing as a way to be present for my child in a culture littered with baby-holding appliances. It seemed natural to me. I didn’t need (or have the budget for) a swing that mimicked my heartbeat. My mother-in-law gave me a ring sling as a gift and I made my first mei tai soon after. Like magic, my daughter fell asleep nearly every time I put her in either one. I didn’t understand it, but it sure was nice to feel her downy head against my chin.
Over the next year, I wore her much of the time, as first children seem to be the ones who don’t want to be put down. We did yard work, cooked (with her on the back), hung out laundry and went for walks to the store. I was able to get things done and offer the kind of presence she needed. I was also able to get her to sleep when she needed a nap. Golden. [Read more…]
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