Is work-life balance a real thing?
As homemakers, whether we work inside the home or outside the home, the work-life balance struggle is real. It’s something that y’all ask about quite often. For years, I struggled to find that balance, I have read books, listened to podcasts, and done research online. I was trying to determine if am I giving enough to my family, my work, my friends, my church, my neighbors and my community, and myself, personally?
And you know what? I always ended feeling defeated. I felt like I was bashing my head against the wall. Like a total, complete, utter failure.
What even is work/life balance?
For the longest time, I always felt like I was aiming for this goal where I needed to be in a perfect place where my kids, husband, business – where everyone and everything got exactly what they needed from me. But I never felt like I hit that mark. I always felt like I was coming up short.
It was like there was a target with a red dot in the center that I was trying to hit. And there have been times where I would think… I’ve done it – I’be finally achieved a work/life balance! But I really hadn’t. What I found is that whenever I finally got to a spot where I thought I had work-life balance, there was an area in my life that had no balance. Even worse, there were people, places, and things I was giving nothing to at all.
In the past few years, I have come to realize that maybe there is no such thing as achieving a work-life balance.
For a while, I felt like I couldn’t do anything right. I saw all these other authors, bloggers, podcasters, etc. who seemed to have perfect marriages, happy kids and amazing work-life balance, while I couldn’t get my act together. I felt like since I wasn’t having success in everything I touched, that something was wrong with me or my business.
So… I quit it all and walked away.
For over 6 months, I completely quit. I walked away from the online community because I felt like such a failure. It was a nice break, but it wasn’t the right thing for me to do. I wasn’t a failure. I was just aiming for something that isn’t possible. #truthbomb
Instead of trying to achieve a work-life balance, I think we need to understand that there are seasons of life. We can’t always do it all perfectly! Instead, it would be better if we aimed to juggle and focus on one thing at a time, instead of balance it all. I am trying to do that with my life.
I’m learning to juggle and focus on one area at a time, instead of aiming to balance it all.
When you juggle you focus on the one thing that is most important at that specific time. And you focus on doing it well! That means you give 100% to one area at a time, instead of spreading yourself too thin. When I am focused on my business and I am giving that my full attention, my landscaping is majorly suffering. Right now, I am only growing rocks, grass and potted plants of dirt. But that’s okay because I am doing well with my business. Maybe you’re leading some big project with a specific deadline. You’ve been cooking super easy meals, you’re tired and you haven’t been giving 100% to your husband. But that’s okay – for a season!
There are times when I need to focus 100% on my children. For example, if I am potty training, teaching them new chores or important concepts in homeschool, I have to let go of some other things in my life for a bit. Y’all, when your kids need your full attention, business, house cleaning, and even quality of cooking and meals, might suffer a bit. But that’s okay!
I used to let this type of thing bother me. But now I don’t.
There is no perfect work-life balance. I need to give 100% of myself to the tasks that need my attention during each specific season. Don’t let yourself feel like a failure for not being able to do it all! I don’t think I every met ANYONE who actually can do it all. I just want to encourage you today… whatever it is you need to focus on doing right now; do that thing to the best of your ability.
Emily says
This is so encouraging! I’m glad to know I haven’t missed the magic key that will help me balance work and homeschool (and the rest of home life). Thank you for the insight!
Julie Chittock says
I love how you put that! Sometimes it seems like we’re missing the trick to it all for sure 🙂 Thanks for the comment, Emily!
Julie, Humorous Homemaking Team
Mauri says
So needed this today! And glad to know others who have positive, up-beat personalities wrestle with this, too. I feel like normally I’m doing alright and have a fairly joyful & sturdy head on my shoulders (even though I’ll still claim we’re a hot mess in my neck of the woods most of the time!), but sometimes I just want to be an ostrich, bury my head in the sand, and just say, “Alright, y’all, I’m done! I give up trying to be good at anything!” Glad to know someone else finds a perfect work-life balance a bit laughable! 🙂 I so enjoy reading your blog! – Mauri @www.theamericanpatriette.com
Julie Chittock says
Yes – a perfect work-life balance is laughable! And I know we all wish we could be ostriches occasionally:) Thanks for the comment, Mauri!
Julie, Humorous Homemaking Team