When Mommy Loses Her Cool {God’s Grace is Sufficient}

I had given a very specific instruction before I left to go to the basement to get laundry out of the dryer. I was probably gone for two minutes – not long at all. But one of my children greeted me at the top of the stairs. “I’m sorry, Mama.” Do you know that feeling of dread that settles over you when you hear those words without seeing what’s going on? It’s like your stomach falls into the floor. Oh. No.

My coffee. Everywhere. My instructions had not been followed and because of that, coffee had been spilled all over my Home Management Notebook that I had spent days making – and all our school papers – and my calendar. And it had spilled down the counter and leaked into the cabinets and drawers. Basically, it was everywhere. You know they say “Don’t cry over spilled milk!” Well, this was coffee, so I felt like it didn’t apply.

I don’t know if it was because I was so tired from lack of sleep the night before (Eli dealing with growing issues) or because my instructions hadn’t been followed or because something I had worked so hard to make was now a total mess. But, whatever it was…I lost it. I totally lost it. No excuses and no reason for it…but I went raving around the house like a complete lunatic. 

I screamed. I slammed things. I said stuff I should NOT have said. And then I just cried. Mostly because I knew that what I had done was wrong. More wrong than someone spilling coffee on my things.

Some days, I feel like a complete failure as a mom. I mess up on a daily basis. I felt like a terrible mom that day – so I hopped on Instagram to get some advice from my other mommy friends – and boy did they deliver. They dug me right out of the pit and set my feet back on the Rock.

I apologized to my kids. We prayed together – and we moved on. Oh the love my children show me, day after day.

God’s grace is sufficient, my friends. Even when you mess up – BECAUSE you mess up. We’re just mommies…we’re not perfect. I needs God’s grace daily. I need my kids’ forgiveness DAILY.

I’m sorry they see me mess up – but then again, maybe not. They see me mess up – ask forgiveness – and repent. That’s a good thing for them to be around…instead of a mommy who thinks she never does wrong. How else can our children learn the art of forgiveness?

Now, because you might not be following me on Instagram (that’s my favorite social media and I share the most there), I decided to share the things other mommies told me – so that you might find encouragement times when you need it. We mommies have to stick together – and we need to learn to support each other like this on a daily basis.

Special note about your children

Please be careful what you share online about your children. Things you type can NEVER be taken back. They might get deleted, but they’re still floating around in cyberspace (ever see Criminal Minds pull things up that were deleted??) for someone to find. I see so many parents say rude and awful things about their children for the whole world to see…but you must realize, one day the time will come when your children are able to see that. Do you really want that to happen? I don’t.

Now…encouragement from my friends on Instagram. Thank you, mommies. Your support and love means so much.

My quote:

If you ever think my life is all fun times and artsy, here’s the truth. I’m an awful mom. Bc one of my children could not obey this morning, coffee was spilled all over my homemaking binder and all our school papers. This binder took me days to make. I screamed and slammed doors and had an awful fit. I’m a terrible mother. And what I need to know is, am I always going to be? Or will I learn better? #thebittertruth #helpmejesus

• Been there, done that. Praise God for his grace. I usually put myself in a mommy time out. Then, repent to my children and we all take turns praying for mami. You’re definitely not the only one. –Diana from My Humble Kitchen
• It happens to the best of us, not an awful mother…just human. 🙂  –Emily
• I had a fit this morning because the overhead light wouldn’t turn on. Hugs to you! –Patty
• Aww. I am so sorry! But you’re definitely not an awful mama! And you’re not alone either. To piggy back what Diana said, God’s grace is sufficient! I’ve already had to steal away and ask God to forgive and help me. –Tara Heath
• I’d like to say that I am that mom more than I want to be. But I’m learning to give myself grace. God’s grace is truly sufficient. –tonewash
• You’re definitely not alone! We’ve all been there. –Nikki Thornton
• Been there more than I like to admit. 🙁 This verse speaks to me that it’s okay to feel angry but the acting out is something I need to work on and pray about. “Be ye angry and sin not; let not the sun go down upon your wrath.” Ephesians 4:26 It does wonders to sit down after an argument and speak softly to my son and apologize for the way I’ve acted. You are not alone for sure! –Meagan Thacker
• I threw a fit this morning too. 🙁 Prayers for you, mama! –Beth
• I think the bitter truth is that most of us moms have moments like these. You are not alone. <3 I do my best to make them teachable moments and apologize to my kids and we pray. We all make mistakes, friend! Praying peace to cover your household today. (This one made me bawl like a baby.) – Donielle from Natural Fertility and Wellness
• Don’t let one moment of time define who you are. Most certainly you are not a terrible mother. Pray, apologize, and give yourself the grace and forgiveness to move on. Jesus redeemed us for moments just like these. Don’t let the guilt of Satan define you as something you are not (another tear jerker). –suburbangranola
• I think you should dry out your pages and put them in page protectors. They could be a humbling reminder. –Stephanie from The Wannabe Homesteader
• You’re normal. There’s a great Lysa TerKuerst quote “Bad moments do not make bad mamas.” I throw fits like this way too often (like daily). Among my prayers, I’ve asked God for his grace to make my kids forget the worst moments. I always ask my kids for forgiveness too. I apologize and tell them “Mommy should not have yelled like that. I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?” My 8 year old is feisty like his mom (read: we both have a terrible temper), which means we battle nearly daily. In fact, I consider it a good day if I haven’t lost my temper with him (sad but true). God is redeeming it because he’s now coming to me, unprompted, and saying “Mommy, I’m sorry I yelled at you. I was wrong. Will you forgive me?” That convicting thing is sometimes he apologizes before me after one of our fights. This is NOT how you’re always going to be. You are NOT a terrible mother. You are an AMAZING mom. The fact that you’re homeschooling SHOWS how much you care about your kids. You’re doing a GREAT job. None of us is perfect and that’s why we need Jesus. I’ll be praying for you today. –Heidi
• We have all been there! –onehappymommy07
• It will get better. Hugs friend. If it were me, I’d throw away those papers and make new ones. Give yourself grace. If I had to look at them daily, I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself fully for acting out. God’s forgiven you. Children have an amazing ability to forgive as well. I threw a highchair and Louis Lamour book at my husband one time. I purposely missed but just the fact that I did that kinda shook me. Imo he was acting like an insensitive jerk. But he didn’t deserve for me to lash out at him like that. I’ve not thrown anything since then. I’ve wanted to though. That was over 5 years ago. –Country Living Mama
• You’re NOT a terrible mom! We ALL have our days. Mine was yesterday. 🙁 love you friend! Praying today gets better. –Becky from Unabridged Becky
• While not a mom myself, we’ve all had our moments…..I can’t say anything more than what everyone else has said, but just to remind you (as you tell us) to give yourself grace, that we are praying for you, that you are’t a horrible mom, your kids will forgive you and not be scarred for life, and it will get easier. Besides – your pages were in protectors (even though they failed this time), and lack of sleep is probably more of a contributing factor than anything. I agree with Heidi & the Lysa T. quote. Just call a mulligan and give yourself a do-over for the day. We serve a God of second (& fifty-second) chances. {{{hugs}}} –Nancy H
• Aw dang. I’m sorry. I try to quickly tell myself it could be worse…after I throw my fit. 😉 hugs….. –Jamie from Milk Allergy Mom
• I think everyone above has said it better than I ever could, but you’re an excellent mom, and we all have those moments. I hope your day improves. I’ll be praying for you!! From one mommy who threw a pity party yesterday and balled about life not being fair in front of her kids. (Not my finest hour). -Kate Smith
• Ain’t a one of us that gots it all together. Know that you aren’t alone, even if you feel that way. That’s the Enemy feeding you lies from the Pit. Sinners raising sinnerlings is tough work. Not for the faint of heart. Praying your day looks Up from here! –Kayla from Renown And Crowned
• I think in some things you will get better (it’s our natural inclination to want to improve) but something that took so much and means so much to you…ya I’d be having a fit. We had a heck of a morning and when we finally made it to the play group is been promising for hours…it was closed. I was so close to laying down on the concrete and crying. No joke. –Kate from Venison for Dinner
• Good thing I’m a perfect mom and can help you out with your mess. I couldn’t even type that without cracking up! Sitting on my hands right now (kind of) so the 2yo doesn’t catch my nap time wrath. Somehow, girlfriend found a WHISTLE. (Parenting is hard,yo.) –Amy from Amy’s Finer Things
• A bad moment or day does not make you a terrible mother! ❤️ we all have them! We’re all human. I only have one and 37 weeks with baby 2, and I have moments like that. I feel so guilty some days but prayer, forgiveness and grace always fix it. Just because we become parents doesn’t mean we become perfect. We still struggle. ❤️ hugs to you! –Leah F
• Thank God you’re normal, hate to think you were some alien creature lol 😉 –Lori Edmonds 
• I’ve reached the point in motherhood where I’m no longer screaming or slamming doors. …. She’s 22 and lives on her own. In another city. 4 hours away. You are not a terrible mother and your children will not be scarred by this moment. I promise ❤️‍ –angeliqueshara
• You are NOT a terrible mother!!!!! You are human! I am sure if we think about it we can all remember times that our mothers lost it, but we still love and respect her! –Cynthia Carter
• You are not a terrible mother. I have trouble with that as well sometimes but I am working on it. Everyone has their days and their moments. I found myself asking my girls for forgiveness the other day because I got upset. My sister in law recommended 2 fantastic books to me that have helped .. She’s Gonna Blow and the other is Grace Based Parenting. –Tammie
• Sometimes mommies need time outs too. We’ve all had those days. –Sara from Your Thriving Family