There are a few moments in time permanently etched in my memory. This was one of those moments.
Annie and I were at her eye doctor appointment. I was doing my normal thang – using my cell phone, looking important, getting so many things done while waiting on that doctor that takes fooooooooooooooorever. Annie was talking with me about something, but I obviously was NOT paying attention. She was nervous, but I had things to do, man.
“Mom, why is your nose always in your cellphone?”
Ya know, she’s said something similar to me before. But I wasn’t ready to hear it. But that day – that day – I heard her. And I felt like God had smacked me right upside the head.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
You have these beautiful kids and this wonderful family right in front of you and you cannot get your nose out of your cellphone for 30 seconds?
I knew right then, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that I was addicted to my smart phone. Addicted to social media. And addicted to cool apps and answering my email from the toilet. I needed a phone detox. I have a Smartphone Addiction.
If you have struggled with any addiction (not just a Smartphone Addiction) or know someone who has, you know that it takes some serious dedication to get out of that mess. It takes effort.
How was I going overcome this in a world that is SO dominated by technology??
You don’t just ask your alcoholic friends to have meetings at the bar. Shopaholics shouldn’t do their speed walking at the mall. I knew I needed to take some drastic steps.
If, like me, you’ve got a smartphone addiction, you need to flee the temptation to constantly be on it by taking some steps that seem crazyville. Because Humorous Homemaking is our business, I can’t get rid of my phone. And I’m not suggesting you do that – but I am suggesting some things that help it be easier to not grab your phone every second of the day.
These are the steps that I followed. They’re working for me – and I hope if you find yourself in the same position as me, that they will help you detox too.
Watch this first:
https://youtu.be/jdpQir1sqiQ
10 Steps to Overcoming Smartphone Addiction
- No More Phones in the Bedroom. I was using my phone as an alarm clock, but that also caused me to check it right before bed and immediately when I got up. I moved my charger to the kitchen and instead of saying Good Morning, Cellphone, I got an alarm clock.
- Turn off ALL Notifications. Yes. All of them. I’m talking text notifications, Facebook notifications, Twitter – everything. You name it. I turned them ALL off. Because seeing my screen light up with a notice is something I am not strong enough to ignore.
- Put Your Phone on Silent. I set up custom ringtones for Dad, my sister and Barry. Why them? Because I want to know immediately if they call or text me. All other texts are set to silent (in the settings) with no notifications. But now, I know when I hear crickets, it’s my sister texting and I can answer it. If you, like me, are clueless, here is a tutorial.
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Unsubscribe from EVERYTHING. Yes. Everything. If reading this blog is making you crazy, unsubscribe. Friend, I unsubscribed from every.single.blog and email I could…with the exception of one (Money Saving Mom). Now, my in my inbox are actual EMAILS. Shocking.
- Unfollow like a boss. This one was hardest for me. I was afraid of hurting feelings, but then I realized I am weak and I needed to take this step. I unfollowed every person I don’t REALLY know in real life (well, except Pioneer Woman). Anyone who wasn’t uplifting and encouraging or a friend I could count on when the poop hits the fan, I unfollowed. It was hard, but I did it. And I only use Facebook for work.
- Delete Apps. I don’t really like apps anyway, but I had a bunch on my phone. So, I deleted Words with Friends and Voxer, to name a couple, but I kept my “necessities.” Anything that causes me to be on my phone instead of in the moment went away.
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Put Down Your Phone. You know what I’m saying here. Remember in the good ole days we took a BOOK to the bathroom? Except now we take our phone and stay in there like we’re taking care of some serious business? No more phones in the potty room.
- Set up Checkpoints. I have certain times of day that I look at my phone. For me, those are during my first breakfast, during lunch, and at night after I put the kids to bed. This doesn’t mean I don’t take care of things during the day for work or if I need to do something specific or speak with someone about a certain thing. It means I don’t browse Pinterest or Instagram every 10 minutes.
- Turn Off Your Phone. Pick a certain time each night to be DONE and turn it off. This one I’m still struggling with, but I will get there. My goal is to put my phone on the charger and be done at 9:30 pm.
- Get an Accountability Partner. For me, it’s my husband and my kids. My kids now ask me, “Mommy, are you working?” It’s the nudge I need to make sure what I AM doing on my phone is legit work and not browsing the “10 foods you should NEVER eat” on Pinterest.
It’s a process, but I’m doing better. I feel better and I feel happier. And now, next time Annie and I are at the eye doctor, I won’t be on my phone. Maybe she and I will do Mad Libs or wait for it…talk.
I was just talking to myself about how I need to back off and join the world again, these tips are helpful thank you!
Glad the tips were helpful!
— Julie, HH Team
I’ve been VERY convicted lately about my cell phone use – and OVERuse. Thanks for the timely article. Great advice for everyone. 🙂
I’m glad to hear it’s helpful, Melanie. I’m still working on this every single day.
A great post and really useful tips. I have already reduced my time on Facebook, but will cut a lot more out of my life – giving me time and space to bible journal ! Ali x
Yay! My husband and I were just talking about you on Thanksgiving. You make my heart smile. <3
So so good! It always breaks my heart a little when I see kids being ignored because something on the phone is more important. It’s easy to do and I am finding I have to be very, very intentional to not reach for my phone. Great post!
Oh yes – it is a VERY intentional thing. And I’m so glad that my kids are helping me with it!
So true. Although I haven’t been addicted to most stuff on my phone, I had to do this with the game Solitare. And it was hard, but after Way too many ‘one more game”s left me up at one am on a work night I had to bite the bullet and totally delete it. Felt like I’d lost a friend for several weeks…And that showed me how insidious it was. I feel so much freer now.
Yup – Words With Friends here.
Good for you! I’m addicted, too. I have had to put similar steps in place for myself as well. When my husband and I first got our smartphones we made the decision to not have our personal e-mails on our phone for many of these reasons. We didn’t know then what a wise decision it would turn out to be, but it’s been SUPER smart. As a result, we only get e-mail while sitting at our computer—on OUR time. (My husband does have a separate work phone that he doesn’t have the luxury of not linking his work e-mail to.)
I fully agree about the notifications. I’ve got all mine turned off, too. I’m in a group text with some ladies that can get chatty. With my old phone I could either silence ALL notifications (meaning I missed some from my husband) or it went off constantly. Thankfully I can now “Do Not Disturb” that particular conversation (90% of my texts) and check it when I have time 🙂
Yes – new phone features are super nice. I love that I can set it up so that I only hear Barry, Dad, and Jamey.
Ok Lord, Ok ……Oh, sorry…but there you were, letting the Lord use your weakness to expose mine. Thank you! I need this. so do my boys. so does my husband. I think I’ll start with me.
Starting with us is usually the best. <3
The Lord dealt with me about my phone a few months ago, “If our phones are not gods to us, why do we keep bowing down to them?” And then again during the night last night. I repented before the Lord for misusing it and apologized to my husband and daughter this morning. Today has been freeing!!!!
I love how God gently nudges us that way! Or with me – sometimes it’s a big ole PUSH. 🙂 I need pushing.
Oh sister, how I needed this. What a hard pill to swallow.. but I will speak publicly here and say how GRATEFUL I am to you for being transparent and then encouraging others.
The unfollowing people has been my most difficult thing because I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Thank you for speaking about this. And I still love you! :))))))
Big hugs,
Janet
It was very, very hard. But my family has seen great benefits from it. I love ya, girl.
You are awesome. I wish so many young moms would wake up and see them selves. My kids are so crabby-hello put down your phone and play with them! I have older children so I have text notifications on. All other notifications off. And yes, it is a constant struggle.
Nadine, you need to talk to my mom. She won’t get texting. LOL 🙂
I don’t have a smart phone (and it’s probably a good thing), however, a few months ago, my husband got me an I-pad. I LOVE IT!!! Before, we only had one computer in the house and my husband used it for work, so I could only troll FB or Pinterest when he wasn’t working, which isn’t that often.
I love it, but it is a big time waster. You know how it is “Oh, I’m just going to see if so-and-so replied to my IM”, 45 minutes later and dinner still needs to be started, that load of laundry is still piled in the floor and the poor dog is crossing his legs because I wasn’t paying attention and he REALLY needs to pee. I’ve instituted a few rules of my own, but I may add some of yours to my list.
Yup – for me, my ipad was just a giant version of my phone. LOL
I did this last year and it has made a big difference. The number one thing was deleting all friends on fb…. I only use my biz page and that has helped me so much! I also have my ringer set to silent (except for my daughter and hubby) and notifications turned off! It’s been over a year now and I won’t go back. I love the freedom of not being available 24/7.
Yes!!! I only use FB for work – which includes a few business groups, but it’s nice to not have to worry about trying to keep up there on the newsfeed.
This is such a valid point! I see so many families stuck on their phones while out eating, myself included! I recently took your advice from a scope looong ago (back with Katch!) how you didn’t have ANYTHING on your phone except the basic necessities. That has been a game changer.
Remember, practice makes perfect! You got this.
I really like to focus on the butter in front of me. Helps me not dribble.
This was the PERFECT timing for this, I need do this so badly. I always make it my goal to not have my recently turned 4 year old say “mom put your phone down.”
I am not able to be a stay at home mom but you always seem to hit the nail right between my eyes and wake me up to so much ~ THANK YOU!!
I recently heard a mom who works outside the home say “When you’re at work, be 100% there. When you’re at home, be 100% there too.” That was helpful to me.
Hi Stacy, As a young woman I worked at a job that required me to be on the phone most of the day. As a result, I came to hate using the phone personally. Many years later, I now have an iPhone which I hardly ever use. I think my bill indicated that I had used 7 minutes last month. I like to Facetime my grandchildren, but that is about it. They require that I text them instead of calling them, but I would much rather hear their voice that to get a 3 word written reply I go nuts when I am out to eat and I see whole families sitting at the same table on engrossed in their cell phones. We are losing our social skills and that is very sad. Good luck.
Facetime is so great when Barry is out of town! And I’m with you on the 3 word answer. My answers are more like three paragraphs. LOL
I use Straight Talk and pay as I go each month. But I don’t always buy my service right away when it expires. Sometimes I’ll go a week or even two weeks with (gasp) no phone. I do it to ensure that I can still live easily without it and to keep disciplining myself to not be attached to it in any form. It’s hard for the first couple days–I wonder what I’m missing on Facebook… I have to open my cookbooks instead of Googling for dinner ideas… But then I began really enjoying it somewhere into the third day or so. I get a lot more decluttering done. My three year old gets even more of my complete focus and attention. We stick to a routine easier. She’s happier. I’m happier. Less stress. Hardly any “external voices” clamoring for my focus. My mind literally relaxes. I don’t know any of this stress is going on until I’m without my phone! I love it. I do live in a rural area where there is only dial up internet that is so slow it’s not even worth paying for so I can’t even use a desk top computer to get on the internet. But it’s really all right. We lived rich lives before all this technology, too, and I get a taste of it every month for a week or two and yes, let me repeat myself–I LOVE IT!
That’s great, Lauren!! Yes – we did survive before the internet. And you know what? Using my phone less, I rediscovered how much I LOVE cookbooks!
I actually just use my phone….as a phone and a desk computer for well for all that other stuff. We actually got rid of FB this year mainly because my hubby hates how they keep changing their algorithms but I didn’t realize how addicted I was to it until I couldn’t just get on (and this is without a smart phone). Social media and other things can be addicting and waste of time especially when the most important things are right in front of us-PEOPLE. It’s been a real eye opener. All your points can apply not to just your phone but computer time in general.
Absolutely – I hardly ever use my phone as a phone. Because #whycallwhenyoucantext. lol
Great tips! It is certainly a struggle!
Daily.
great article Its ironic that this page has all kinds of adds for cell phones, cable and wifi inserted on it :/
That’s thanks to targeted marketing. 😉