I pride myself on being a planner. (My entire family is shaking their head in agreement right now.) I am ALWAYS ready. I plan everything. It’s how I roll. I don’t like being caught off guard…at least I didn’t before I was a mom.
When I became a mom, I lost my mind. Literally. I can’t remember ANYTHING right now. I misplace stuff all the time, I forget extra clothes on car trips, sometimes I get a snack for Annie and forget her drink, and sometimes I leave the laundry in the washer a long time because I forgot I was doing laundry. I know that Barry wonders what on earth has happened to his wife…sometimes I wonder too – but wondering too much makes me forget what I was doing before I started wondering.
There is a term for this disease. It’s called MOMNESIA.
Even though I packed WEEKS in advance for Annie’s birth, I forgot one major thing…stuff for Barry. I didn’t even pack the poor man any clothes. In my rush to get everything for Annie, I forgot that Barry might want clean underwear. Uhhhh, oops?
Thanks to Barry’s mom, we were able to get the poor man a change of clothes from his brother’s closet. And so began my descent into craziness. And every day it just gets worse.
For a while, I had wanted to pack my bag so that I could be prepared…but my mind wouldn’t work. I’d go into the bedroom and think “Okay, time to get this bag ready!” And I couldn’t think of the first thing to put in there.
Finally, I had a small pile started. Do you want to know what was in it? I’ll tell you: organic strawberry suckers, dark chocolate, and Earth Mama Angel Baby New Mama Bottom Spray. Obviously I am very concerned about suckers, chocolate, and my bottom. Somehow, those just seem to go together.
Finally, I had to resort to something I’ve never done before…I had to get someone else to make my list. It was almost like letting someone else pilfer through my panty drawer – except for me, it’s worse to let someone pilfer through my kitchen cabinets. Yeah, that.
My wonderful doula, Brandy, made my hospital list. Her services never end. If you don’t have a doula, get one. They make lists.
So, all the bags are packed…mine, BARRY’S, The Bean’s, and Annie’s. Annie will be staying with my mom and I didn’t want to forget her…if I have her bag, I won’t accidentally leave her here at the house and have to call my mom from the hospital so she can rush over to find Annie knee deep in water – the child has a fascination with playing in the bathroom.
Also, once my mind was rolling I had a flashback. This time, I didn’t pack a bunch of stupid stuff like I did with Annie – although I’m still convinced I forgot something crucial this time – like deodorant, a brush, or peanut butter.
When Annie was born, I had an entire bag full of stuff I never even touched….about 4 zillion toys, 50 blankets, baby wipes, but NO ONESIES. For Pete’s sake….
I have the bare essentials this time…because just in case you didn’t know, a newborn doesn’t really have much interest in playing with a set of plastic keys. Ahem.
- ONESIES for Pete’s sake!
- A going-home outfit
- The Boppy
- Socks…but they never stay on
- Two hats
- A swaddle blanket
- Udder Cover for company
- The end
Oh, and chocolate for me.
I totally have lost my brain. 7 weeks pregnant with munchkin #2 and I just found the milk…in the pantry…with the flour. Oh dang, at least it was only half full!
That’s okay…I’ve done that with ice cream. LOL
Oh, I know you are sharing a lot of real wisdom and practical advice here…and someday when I have kids, I’m going to remember this…but your post is so stinkin’ funny, I can’t stop laughing 🙂 🙂 🙂 I’m glad you’ll be better prepared this time around for the new little-one-to-be 😉 🙂 Love and hugs from the ocean shores of California, Heather 🙂
Probably only better prepared in my mind. LOL
I’m sure you will have packed everything you need and more! So excited for you and your soon arrival!
BHAHAHA! Whatever – yesterday I had to recheck and make sure there was underwear in there. 😉
Haven’t you heard? Insanity is hereditary… we get it from our kids!!
LOL That’s funny!
You are just too cute!
Thanks. 🙂 I don’t feel very cute right now.
You crack me up Stacy 🙂 I have no idea what to pack in my hospital bag so this was really helpful thanks!! 🙂
Don’t forget two things: underwear and chocolate.
Great list! My husband actually had to pack for us. We planned for a homebirth and I never got around to packing a hospital bag, just in case. Well, just in case happened and the poor man had to quickly pack for both of us. Fortunately our midwife was there to help. 🙂
God bless that midwife. Amen.
My sister and I have a name for this condition – mommy brain. It’s very convenient to be able to blame “mommy brain” for the times we can’t remember what we were supposed to be doing/saying/thinking, etc. 🙂
And any other mommy would just nod their head and go with it…totally.
Aunt Judy will bring whatever you forget or decide you want. No worries.
I know I’ve forgotten something important…..now I have to go check my bag for underwear.
You crack me up! Totally know about the momnesia. My first came almost a month early, so I hadn’t even packed my hospital bag yet. I was home by myself when my water randomly broke (my husband was 3 hours away hunting with no cell phone service). I was running around like a mad woman trying to pack. Know what I packed? All the clothes he could possibly need, and two magazines for myself. That’s right, nothing for the baby, and nothing else for me but reading material!
At least I learned my lesson and packed WAY ahead of time when I had baby #2 🙂
LOL That’s a complete hoot!
I told my doctor that amniotic fluid is really just watered down brain cells. He didn’t agree, but i think there’s enough proof in the world…… Thanks for the laughs!
LOL Thanks for that one too!
ha… I think hanging around children in general causes loss of memory. I have no children but I work at a baby house for children of incarcerated parents. I love these kids to death, but since I’ve worked here, my memory has gone seriously downhill. Kids should have a memo that comes with them: be prepared, prolonged cuddling, kissing, hugging, and just looking at these bundles of joy causes permanent memory loss. 🙂
Amen to that! 🙂
The heck with a better memory before kids, how about the peace and quiet? After having 3 children I decided those 26 years of being an only child was pretty nice. I guess things have changed since I nursed my children(1961 – 1965) because I was told not to eat chocolate. Best wishes for the new arrival and a fast labor. Take care.
I ate an obscene amount of chocolate with Annie. 🙂 That chocolate is for my after-birth celebration!
😀 I can’t wait to see pictures of this baby! I think I took a set of plastic keys with me for my first, too. What did I know about newborns? I’d never even changed a diaper before! I really wonder how these children have survived.
Yeah – I wonder too about Annie…seeing as how I did a HUGE amount of no-nos.
Stacy, wait until you have to change the Bean’s diaper the first time. You are going to think Annie’s bottom is really huge! 🙂
Yes…been a little while since there was a little bottom around here.
I am sooooo glad everyone else is complaining about the memory thing. I honestly thought I was developing some kind of disease! It has been almost 13 years since my twins were born and my memory is….HORRID!!!!! Can’t wait to hear that Bean is here and see all those beautiful family pics! Hey, don’t forget to pack the camera!!
It’s on the list!!! 🙂
After my four, my memory is less than desirable (to put it mildly) and it never came back :-/ Seriously, I forget EVERYTHING! It only takes 2 seconds to get me completely distracted onto something different, with whatever I was doing long lost in a distant memory. Before kids I had a very sharp memory…that was 9 years ago 🙂
Glad you have a great doula to help!!!
Whew, me too! Otherwise, I’d be in a heap of trouble! lol
Stacy, So excited for you and your family as you welcome your new little one into the world. I had a C Section with my son, and so I packed a dress to wear home in because I didn’t want to wear tight clothing around my middle. I breastfed him too, and I think I was given some cream to help with the soreness that comes with breastfeeding. Do you have some of that too? If you can, please post pics of your new little one, so we can all rejoice along with your whole family. 🙂
Oh yeah….I have also packed my Earth Mama Angel Baby Nipple Cream. 🙂 No need to worry – there will be TONS of pictures!
I’m in the same boat- only less prepared! I’m a planner too and I keep trying to pack my bag, but every time I do, I get: Cute hospital gown, Clothes for baby, baby nail file… that’s it! My nurse asked me with the first baby if I left the kitchen sink in the car because it seemed I had everything else!
Good Luck with the bean, I’m anxious to see him or her!
So am I!! But not until AFTER the wedding. 🙂
Don’t take cute for you. Cute gets bled on after birth. Take a cute blanket to cover the bed if people drop in.
Well, I bought this matching nightgown with newborn onesie….I HAVE to take that Tina..I have to. 🙂
You are hilarious!
Awww, gee. 🙂
Being an adoptive mom, I can assure you that ‘momnesia’ is not an effect of pregnancy. I was always the one with a near photographic memory – tell me something once, and it was there – locked tight in the safety of my mind. More importantly, I could retrieve it – EASILY. I never had to write down dates, appointments, or phone numbers!
Now if it weren’t for my calendar with the “big blocks’, my computer with all the dings and dongs for the reminders and for heaven’s sake, my cell phone with the capacity to remember a bajillion phone numbers, I’d be completely lost! I can SOOOO relate!
May God Bless you in your final days of your pregnancy and give you healthy and safe delivery. 🙂
Oh wait….we’re supposed to remember phone numbers? Dude. I’m in trouble. 9-1-1
Hysterical. Bottom spray? Never heard of such a thing. Packing for an adoption….so totally relate! I’m lost and can’t begin. Google is my doula. Glad you are getting ready. Can’t wait to meet the Bean!
LOL It’s spray to give you some relief in case there is tearing down south during pushing. 😉
Oh Honey! My theory is that I lost 10% of my brain capacity with each child so I’m only operating on 70% to start with! That’s my excuse and I’m sticking by it! 🙂 Praying for a safe and healthy delivery for you and Bean!
Thanks, Lori. 🙂 And I think you operate in full capacity!
Great…that explains it! I am preggo with #6…so down to 40% here ;-(
LOL
Baby toys for newborns. Haha. But still, we’ve all done it. 😉
Yeah….that was totally stupid. 🙂
When I was pregnant with my first child, I went to the doctor in tears and asked, “Is the baby taking all my intelligence? Just sucking me dry?” I was forgetting things, couldn’t concentrate at work, putting my keys in the freezer (or throwing them in the garbage – that was an amazing day) – just dumb things like that. He assured me that I was normal, the baby wasn’t sucking my intelligence out of my brain like an octopus, and that things would return to normal. That was 28 years ago – I’m still waiting…
LOL Yeah…my mom tells me it’s not coming back. 🙂
*GASPS in horror* Never???