When I’m having a workshop, the questions always vary. “Does vinegar in the wash make you smell like a pickle?” “Can I sniff you?” “How do you store 25 pounds of beans?” “How do you know when your milk is bad?”
BUT, there is always one question that I get at every single workshop. Sometimes it’s asked aloud, and sometimes I’m asked in private afterwards. “But Stacy…how do you get ALL that done?!” How can I make all my stuff homemade? How can I grind wheat and make bread and then have time to vacuum up all the dirt tracked in by my toddler? How can I hang dry my clothes? How can I take the time to save money by visiting yard sales?
The answer is simple…I don’t do it all.
Coming Clean
Please understand something. Yes, I do make multiple posts about things that I do at home…like homemade mouthwash, homemade croutons, using cloth diapers, and scrubbing the toilet. BUT, I don’t do them all every day. It’s just not possible.
I don’t get it all done…I’m just one Mommy. I don’t have a mommy-helper. Sometimes I have help from my mom, but not every day. I have to tackle what I can do day-by-day. Some days I clean. Some days I don’t. Some days I make homemade bread and some days I’m too tired to cook dinner so we eat popcorn. The important thing to remember on your journey to frugality and sustainability is this – GRACE. You won’t be able to do it all every day…but you can tackle ONE thing today.
If the thought of trying to measure up to Susie Does It All Homemaker down the street has kept you from trying anything at all, then forget her. Let me tell you something else – she likely sweeps her dirt under the carpet just like everyone else. If you open her closet, you might get creamed with flying debris. Start from where YOU are and quit looking at everyone else.
I’m Not Superwoman and Neither Are You
This is something I’ve had to learn….I can’t do it all, but I can do something little every day. Whatever you have time for today, just make it count. If you have time to make laundry detergent today, then make a quadruple batch…if you have time to make bread, then make a double batch and freeze the other loaves for later. The important thing is to manage your time well.
Listen, I am not Super Woman. I’ve actually had people call me that. I hope I’ve given you a pretty good view of how I really am – I mess up on a regular basis. I set fires on the stove…and in the oven. I spill entire batches of granola. I pour kefir down the sink in moments of stupidity. Sometimes I wipe a butt, miss and get poop all over my hand. It happens. I mess up. You mess up. We’re human and we can’t do it all.
We’re not meant to do it all. We’re meant to do what we can to the best of our ability. That’s it. So the next time you wonder how Stacy gets it all done, remember this…I have dust bunnies that have taken up residence in my corner – and they don’t look like they’ll be moving out any time soon.
Thank you!
I just want to thank you for reminding all of us moms that we all are only human and not super woman! I had to learn this about 5 years ago when I had back surgery.I got so mad that I couldn’t do what I use to do in a day. I learned something though, my friends didn’t like me less, my husband helped me more, and I forgave myself for not being able to accomplish all the things that I thought had to be done on a daily, weekly or monthly basis. I learned to do what I could and not worry about what didn’t get done.
Thank you again 🙂
Good enough is good enough for me!
What an incredible post!! I’ve been struggling with this as a newly “at-home” mom, who is trying to go a little crunchy. No more chemical cleaners, laundry detergent or shampoos and conditioners, no more processed foods. I’m baking my own bread, cooking real foods every night and trying to maintain a garden, animals and 4 children. I’ve beaten myself up because I can’t get it all done, I’m glad to know that I’m not alone.
Stop beating yourself up….it’s a just a waste of time – I know, because I’ve been there. 🙂 And if you ever need a pick-me-up, you just give me a shout! We’ll stick together.
Oh this is so so so so true! Bottom line – we’re human. Can’t wait to get to Heaven and be rid of these earthly struggles!
Preach it, sista!
It totally is all about time management. Some days I get so much done and other days not so much. You can tell when I’ve been busy working (I work at home) because the house is mess. But it’s getting little things done here and there that make a big difference. When the kids are finishing up their lunch I’m cleaning the kitchen, that sort of thing. I know people think I’m always cleaning and everything is perfect, but they don’t see me on the days when I’m sitting around doing nothing and the house is a mess. 🙂
LOL Making the most of the time you DO have is what matters…and that will vary from day to day. 🙂 Moms are great at multi-tasking!
Great post, Stacy. I read it at exactly the right time. Our house is on the market and someone is coming in an hour to see it. I did the best I could; now I leave it to the Lord!
Roxy in Montana
🙂 Your best is good enough. And I hope your house sells!!!!
It’s posts like this that remind me how much I love your blog. There have been blogs that I have stopped following, because despite the good information they give, they we’re very “all or nothing”. I look forward to reading your posts.
Katie, I could receive no higher compliment. Thank you.
Love this Stacy!!! Thank you for sharing your heart 🙂
Thanks Jami…sharing my heart is my favorite part of this blog!
Definitely NO spandex!
*Shudder*
I so enjoy your posts. This one in particular strikes home for me and I hope your readers take it to heart. As a mom of three (now grown) boys, I learned the hard way that I just could not be perfect, but I could be good enough!
Good enough is good enough for me! 🙂
Great post! I think we need more GRACE, all the time, with each other. It’s so easy to see blogs and facebook posts and pinboards filled with fabulous things others are doing and then think we’re not doing enough.
This is why I feel like it’s super, duper important to be brutally honest (in real life and on my own blog) about my ups and downs. Lay it all out there, let everyone know we’re *real* people with *real* struggles!
Thanks for sharing!!! I think we ARE super-women…precisely because we’re honest about not being able to do it all, all the time. 🙂
Yes, maybe we ARE Superwomen! Minus the spandex. LOL
Very edifying Stacy, if Susie Does It All Homemaker does do it all, it is at the expense of her relationships and hobbie-time. You are right that you can’t do it all every day. I determined years ago what was an acceptable level of “clean” and funny, but that level has continued to adjust downward as I have acquired a husband, dog, children, In-laws in my home, homesteading and homeschooling. We all have the same amount of time, but the Lord gave us different gifts,missions, and challenges. Learning how to best use them all to His Glory is the trick. Thank you for using your time well.
🙂 Using them best for His glory is my goal….and it sounds like you’re doing that too! Thanks!
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you for telling the truth. I have struggled many days with feeling like a failure for not being able to “do it all”. I’ve found myself doing nothing since “I’ll fail no matter what I do.” I wish more moms would be honest and open.
The next time you need a little pick-me-up, you give me a holler. 🙂 You are NOT a failure!!
Great post!
Oh, we feed our dust bunnies. 🙂
Dude! I never thought I needed to feed mine. I hope they’re not dead….
As I said when you posted about “not soaking your flour” (GASP!), when is good enough, enough? I’ve been trying to make the transition from being a working PT/homeschooling mom to being a full-fledged SAH/homeschooling mom. It’s been hard–not only do I miss the paycheck (and I loved my job! once…)–but I keep feeling that I’m never going to get caught up on all the stuff that didn’t get done while I was working…over the last 17 years. *EYEBROW*
What do you suppose the odds are that I’m ever gonna get caught up? Really? I think it’s probably more likely that I’ll hit big on the lottery, don’t you?? LOL I better play this weekend!
Still I AM very much a Type A personality, and sometimes I get very down on myself for not getting as much done during the day as I “planned” to. My hubby has been pretty good about reminding me–ONE thing at a time, then move on to the next. Meals need to be made. Laundry needs to be done. Essential Schoolwork is Not optional. Everything else is just…extra!
Do we ever catch up? I hardly think so…there is always something else that needs to be done. 🙂 I struggle a lot with being upset when my day doesn’t go as planned and I get NOTHING done. It’s so wonderful to have a supportive husband, like you do as well, that reminds me that every day that I take care of my family is a day that is well spent.
LOL–We may never catch up–but even the days when “NOTHING” gets done, I think it helps to make a list (even if it’s just in your head while you do the dishes) of what I did accomplish that day. Some days it looks like a) got up, b) got to bed a reasonable hour!
I love lists in my head! 🙂
Love this! I think more bloggers need to come clean–and admit we’ve been humbleD! It’s physically impossible to do it ALL! Oh, and the pic of the fire on the stove? That, ahem, could totally be at my house. 😉 Thanks for the great, REAL post!! 🙂
We need to come “clean.” Pun intended, right? 😉
“Comparison is the thief of joy.”
~Theodore Roosevelt
AMEN!!!!!!!!! I love that quote! Thanks so much for sharing it!
Good post. As a single working mom of 2, I only get done what I can in the time I have. The rest will just have to wait. And you know what ? That’s okay.
It’s TOTALLY okay! 🙂
Love this post, love you! You make me laugh!
🙂 You are easily amused. lol
Great post. I also tell people that it takes far less time/effort to make laundry soap or wash cloth diapers than for me to load up four kids and rodeo through Target! 🙂
Thanks!
Tara
Oh my gosh….you are SO RIGHT! I didn’t even think about that part….that almost gives me a nervous breakdown. LOL
Stacy, you hit the nail on the head! There’s blogs out there about how you must have shiny white floors with no scuffs, how everything must be spotless at once, how all must be done to please hubby. Here hubby is happy when I cook a meal, when I do the laundry (and I do it by hand on a scrub board most often due to no washing machine/dryer), when I actually halfway keep the dishes caught up, etc. Does it all get done at once? Nope. With 3 special needs kids and a hubby, nothing gets done all at once.
I’d like to meet the lady that gets it all done at once. 😉 I’m not sure she really exists.
Good for you. And a healthy attitude, as your family grows! None of us get it all done, either. Blessings!
LOL And we have to stick together! Thanks, Leslie!
this makes me feel SO much better! i didn’t get my floors mopped over the wkend and mt saint laundry is about to topple over. i spent time w/my friends, my favorite lil cousins, my momma and my honey. i also spent time at an awesome worship svc. yesterday was filled w/hours outside working on my mother’s and father’s day gifts. so who really cares about my dirty floors? 🙂
I’m pretty sure that when your kids are old and grown, you won’t lament over the fact that you wish you had mopped more floors. 🙂 I try to remind myself of that on a daily basis….
Thanks for being real!
That is one of the reasons that I love your blog!
🙂 Thanks, Kathy! I always love your comments!
Well said!
Thank you! 🙂
Stacy, you really do make sence. Love your thoughts in this post. Its great to know that I can’t do it all, but I can do enough. Enough is not everything and never will be. Trying to do more just makes me less, less of a great mum, less of a loving wife, less of a good friend. I think it was Sarah Bessey (http://www.emergingmummy.com/) who wrote about being enough because He is enough and I try to remember that too!
Most of the time, doing enough is enough. 🙂
Well said! I always tell people that I didn’t just wake up one day and decide to make everything from scratch. I started by making one thing, then another, then another. When you tackle one thing at a time it isn’t overwhelming. This is especially important to remember if you are new to the simplicity lifestyle.
You’re right…it’s really important. If you try to do it all at once, you’ll just have a breakdown and be admitted to the insane hospital. 🙂
With 4 kids that I homeschool, I don’t even TRY to get it all done, because it doesn’t do much good to make the effort. LOL
🙂 And that’s why I love ya, Becca.